Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Can I be Serious for a Moment?

I like to stay light on the blog, posting about happy things, occaisionally a few posts about not so happy things, but in general I try not to rock the boat. But, recently it has been brought to my attention that there are many Mom's out there who just don't like being a Mom.

You see, I bought a 'Women's' magazine recently, something I rarely do, but wanted to read an article. The magazine is supposed to be celebrating Mother's Day. I found that about half the articles were about how tough and hard it is to be a Mom, how they felt guilty for putting their kids in daycare in order to go to work. But, at the same time feel that it is their turn to be by themselves. One article even listed four or five books that you can read that deal with how motherhood isn't all its made out to be.

This magazine, which I won't name, neither will I name the books, has been around for many years. The more articles I read the angrier I got. I guess I really shouldn't feel angry, but I did.

I know Motherhood is hard. Being a Mom is hard. And you know what it should be (in my opinion). You are responsible for someone's life. A child that you created and made counts on you to be there for them. To teach them, to nurture them and to love them.

Sure there are days that are harder than some. Some days you are too tired to even think straight. Some days are exhausting just from answering a million questions, over and over again. And some days are perfect. That is just what happens when you are a Mom. But, you know what? That happens when you aren't a Mom and you go to work and have to deal with different things coming and going. The difference is when you leave work you can check that at the door and deal with it again tomorrow. When you are a Mom you can't just turn it off and walk away. That is just the way it is.

Several women in one article were asked if they knew it was going to be so hard, would they choose to have children again. Some of them actually said no. I couldn't believe it, their kids could be reading that article. They went on to say how much they loved their children but that if given a second chance they wouldn't do it again. It is just too hard. I was a little shocked at this. I guess I figure that most women I know either know they want to have kids or know they don't want to have them (and I am talking about grown women thinking into their future, not young adults or teens even who probobly don't know what they want to do for a job, let alone being a Mom).

Sorry, I am getting carried away. I originally wanted to write this to say how wonderful I think being a Mom is because I really felt these articles could scare away some good Mom's out there before they even get a chance. Maybe I will have to write my own article, that just talks about how great it is to be a Mom and how wonderful it can all be, just so the would-be Mom reading has both sides to look at. Because sometimes being a Mom is just the best thing in the whole world and you want to share that joy with others.



Blogger mrsmogul said...

In general being a mom is great but other days when my patience is thin I Crack! It's the hardest job in the world. Some days I hate being a stay at home mom, but then I can't imagine being without the baby for one hour!

3:35 PM  
Blogger 180/360 said...

I love being a mom, too. It is challenging sometimes but without question the greatest thing I've ever done.

6:32 PM  
Blogger familymclean said...

dido to the above, I love my babes and wouldn't give up staying at home for anything! Somedays I am pulling my hair out, but then I just have to stop and watch from a distance and the tears well up, what an amazing gift children are!
Ok, now the reason I am leaving a comment in the first place.
I was checking out the banner SAJ made you and noticed you are on blogspot as well. I am just learning how to edit HDML and have figured out how to change the background but cannot get my banner that I created to show up. Can you give me a hand?
Thanks, from a fellow Canuck, (who also lives a vicarious beach life through SAJ's blog.) =-)

11:00 PM  
Anonymous kailani said...

When I was younger, I never felt like I "had" to have kids. Now that they're here, I can't imagine life without them. Even when they're tearing up the house!

12:27 AM  
Blogger Silver Creek Mom said...

You know Anna. Somepeople like things in neat like packages. being a Mom ISN'T like that. I think if Jack didn't want kids I would have beenfine with that at the time. BUT Now OMG I can't imgine my life with out my kids. @ wonderful things in my life made me so proud yesterday. Nathan's Conference where I found out how easy he finds school and Miranda's Play. My life is my kids. And I thank GOD I had one so I wanted so badly to have the other. LIFE is way easy but Perfect.

9:01 AM  
Blogger kate5kiwis said...

Maybe I will have to write my own article
well, you've made a blimmin' good start. love your thoughts.
i hate the *low* status being "just a mom" gets ya in our culture.

i love my kids. they're all my fave friends and they've really grown me up over the years.
sometimes i wonder what life would be like if i hadn't become pregs at 19, and then had five kids. probably way more selfish than i am now. and richer financially. maybe. but then, i am so glad for who we are all becoming because of this wild and fun adventure.
i wouldn't swap it for all the magazine-empires in the world.

4:40 PM  
Blogger Phara Thomas said...


6:24 PM  
Blogger chichimama said...

You should write an article.

Being a mom is hard. there are days that I long for my pre-kids life. But then something always happens to make me wonder why I waited to long to have kids...

9:06 PM  

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